A Coach, A Mentor, A Sponsor- 3 Essential Roles You Want and Need to Grow and Be Successful In Your Career

When I first started my career, I only knew of one key relationship I had to foster at work, the one with my manager. Back then, I had never heard of the other roles of coach- except for an athletic or music coach, mentor- except for a teacher or professor, and sponsor- except for vendors who paid for a service/advertisement. These titles were completely foreign to me. Little did I know, way back then, of the importance of each of these in progressing a career. And that is not to say that the manager role can’t perform some of these other ones as part of their relationship with you, but, to be fair, each has a different emphasis and place of importance in your career. And here’s how I’ve learned to see it:

The manager role is the easiest to understand, as it’s essential to your job. Someone has to be responsible for assigning you work and seeing that you perform it sufficiently.

The coach role is different. It’s someone who can help you solve problems by asking all the right (and oftentimes difficult) questions. This person is there to help you improve a skill or get past a bottleneck. Sometimes you have one assigned to you by your boss/company, and sometimes you seek/hire one on your own.

The mentor role is vastly different. It’s someone who you can trust to draw on their experience or a best practice to get an answer or gain perspective. They are often vested in your interest and naturally want to help you. Oftentimes you find them outside of your organization, but sometimes these are assigned to you, or you naturally begin cultivating a relationship with them while you are there. That relationship can and oftentimes does continue long after you’ve left your company.

The sponsor role is by far, to many, the most abstract. It’s oftentimes your biggest champion, and must be a person of sufficient influence to help advance you in some way. Yes, this can be your manager/boss, but many times it isn’t. When it’s someone who’s seen your work, observed your style, is a fan of your “brand”, and most importantly, cares enough to see you progress and does something to that effect, you have a sponsor.

Going back to the past….we were taught that we had to show up each day, work hard, make some sacrifices, and build relationships, all which are true. The boss/manager is there to give instructions and help us when we run into issues.  But what of these other roles could help us, beyond the one that is also measuring us? I would argue that all 3 roles (coach, mentor, sponsor) are all essential! And here are the reasons why:

1) You lack skill or simply can’t see beyond your blind spot- you need a COACH. The coach will delve deep into cycles, ask situational what-if questions, and will remain objective enough to allow you space to actually see where you have options, and help you formulate a plan around them. A coach will remain neutral, but will hold you accountable to your plan. They are interested in seeing you successfully solve your own problems, as you are the expert (not them.)

2) You want to bounce ideas by someone with more skill/experience than you, even wisdom- you need a MENTOR. The mentor may be someone from within or outside of your organization, someone who knows more about things that you don’t. This is someone trustworthy, whose experience you respect and know can guide you. The mentor may be someone you know intimately well, but may also be someone you know enough to be comfortable sharing personal and sensitive matters with without fearing consequences. In many cases, the mentor is somewhat of an expert, and you learn from them over time.

3) You have done the hard work, have built a solid reputation, and need someone with influence/power to champion you- you need a SPONSOR. The sponsor role is perhaps the most overlooked of all. Maybe it’s because sponsors appear more as a byproduct of what you do versus what you seek, whereas the other two can be sought out or even assigned to you in some organizations. The sponsor is someone who does some meaningful rallying for you behind closed doors, and has direct impact on how your work is seen, acknowledged, and finally, rewarded. While your manager may be getting you coached (or coaching you directly) and you are privately getting mentored…still you may be overlooking the opportunity to seek and secure the most important of these roles; the sponsor. Without at least one sponsor, it’s a much longer and more arduous climb up the corporate ladder, and one where there’s real possibility of burnout and dis-engagement.

To simplify the difference between these 3 roles, I placed them into a chart- highlighting the What, How and When to engage with a coach, a mentor, or a sponsor. To be fair, the inspiration for this chart came from a beautifully written editorial that summarized the differences as this, “A coach talks to you, a mentor talks with you, and a sponsor talks about you.” For more insight on what this means, see this full article. https://www.mentorshipmoment.com/blog/mentorship-vs-coaching-vs-sponsorship-finally-explained

Finding the time and balance for these relationships.

As I looked back at the value I’ve personally received from these different roles throughout my career, I started correlating them with a hierarchy, in a way that influenced my career. In the beginning of our careers, we may be full of passion and ambition, but we lack in skill and tact. This is when our managers recognize they have to assign us work, administer its execution, and give us instruction to improve.

As we look to refine this skill, we look to get “coached.” An example could be someone needing to be coached on analysis skills, looking at data and creating charts and drawing conclusions from reviewing data and trends. Another person may need coaching in presentation skills, or may have fears of public speaking in general, so they gain confidence from that role. Another common area may be in conflict resolution- having a fear of addressing differences in a civilized, emotionally intelligent way may be an area for building proficiency.

As we start to need a confidante, an advisor, an expert to share their experience and even “teach” us how to evolve ourselves, we start to look for and find (sometimes haphazardly so) our mentors. These are the individuals that naturally want to help us, and care innately about our well-being. I have to admit, I’ve sought out and have been sought out more so by this role than the others, and it’s been extremely rewarding for me to have many of them over time, and for different purposes. (And for all my mentors out there…a deep, genuine thank you to all of you.)

As we find ourselves needing someone in our corner, someone to take interest in our careers, we long for a sponsor. While I’d like to say we look for one, most don’t know to do that. We hope and pray that we do the work and we get noticed, but, in reality, there’s more than can be done to have a sponsor. It starts with relationship building. Building trust, working with transparency and consistency are part of the equation. Add to that a tenacity for asking to be supported at the right time and place, and you’re golden. I don’t know too many people that are ”naturals” at acquiring sponsors, but they are out there. Perhaps the burden shouldn’t fall purely on the workers. Leaders have a responsibility for observing, taking interest and championing hard-working, talented workers. They’re a big part of the equation too.

To outline this progression, I depicted this in a pyramid, with what each role does for you. You’ll find at the bottom is your manager, and there will be many more of those, helping you get started, helping build you up in basic skill and experience. But to really expand your career, the others each play a pivotal role.

What this feels like, within the relationships.

Unless you’ve experienced the other roles beyond a manager, you may think your manager is your coach and mentor at times. You may even thing he/she is also your sponsor. All of these partial roles can be part of what they do for you, but to be fair, their goal is to get you to do the work, and to do it well. If they have to coach you a little, and mentor you a little more, they will do that from time to time (maybe not so well though.) And sometimes your manager is your biggest sponsor, depending on what influence/power he or she has within the organization.

As you start engaging with a coach, a mentor, a sponsor, you will feel support from different angles. Without over-simplifying things, I thought about the words I would use to describe what being coached, mentored, and sponsored have felt like to me. And this could be what you feel too.

I know that by defining these 3 roles I may have helped clarify what they do and how they work, however, I would hope that there is no expectation from this that there is an absolute perfect or set formula you should follow. For me, I follow my intuition, my gut. When I’ve listened to that little voice inside my head (and heart) it guided me to  finding the right person, the right role to help me in areas where I needed help. I wish I’d known more about the critical role of the sponsor earlier in my career though, but it’s never too late to learn and evolve.

Lastly, for those of you who have benefitted from any or all of these roles, I encourage you to step into them from the other side, and be that coach, that mentor, that sponsor. These aren’t roles exclusively reserved for those with leadership titles. But it does take a leader to influence others. With or without a title, you could be that leader. The reward of giving back is far greater than you could imagine, especially when you see growth and success in others.

For more on these unique roles, and what they mean, see the following editorials:

Dr Kim Villeneuve-

https://centerstonesearch.com/difference-between-a-coach-a-mentor-and-a-sponsor/

Dr Ruth Gotian-

https://www.forbes.com/sites/ruthgotian/2020/08/04/why-you-need-a-role-model-mentor-coach-and-sponsor/?sh=66e1e2d57c48

Lawrence Olokede, Kenyona Chaney, Sandra

Graciahttps://www.encounteryourpotential.com/post/difference-between-a-coach-mentor-and-sponsor